The Power of Outgrowing People

“You don’t ever have to feel guilty about removing toxic people from your life...

... It’s one thing if a person owns up to their behavior and makes an effort to change. But if a person disregards your feelings, ignores your boundaries, and continues to treat you in a harmful way, they need to go.” – Daniell Koepke

I’ve always realised that at any point in my life, there is at least one person I’d like to delete. No, don’t get me wrong, wait, and let me explain. When I say this statement out load, people misinterpret me as a rude person. To be honest, I get their point. Lately, I am understanding contrasting perspectives because lately, I am developing respect for those who have perspective in the first place! That’s common sense right? Different people having dissimilar perspectives? And yet, we fight over different opinions because we need validation on our life decisions. Couple of years back, if I had the approval stamp from a friend, I’d consider the most messed up decisions. I’d choose a friend like that instead of someone questioning my decisions. That was just the tip of the iceberg. Now that I have the vision to look deep down, I realize that I mistook these “approval stamps” as support. Well, recently, I’ve changed that in my life. I didn’t really take measures to accomplish that. Honestly, it just happened. Maybe, this is what they call "growing up". Despite that, I’d still like to delete a couple of people today. What happened to my “perspective” theory? Well, it still exists. Just because xyz is venomous for my rainbow vibes, doesn’t mean xyz is wrong or doesn’t deserve to have a life. Right?

Oh! I have another theory – “No grudges”. It’s self-explanatory. I don’t know how, but I don’t remember all the mean things people did or said to me in the past. It might seem erroneous, you know, in a - "how are you going to treat people the way they treated you if you don't remember what they did?", - way. Well, I am happy this theory keeps me and my solitude together. That's another theory - "Believe theories that don't derange you".

However wrong it may sound, I'd love to outgrow people. Ah! there it is! She finally touched the catchy title! Oh well, if I don't feel energetic around you, you aren't going to feel energetic around me. Then, I won't learn anything from you and vice versa. Eventually, I'd dislike you and then attract the same vibe towards me. Oh! I'd hate anything that disrupts my rainbow!

Hence, I choose the easier way around - respectfully detaching people I cannot connect to. This way, I minimize the risk of psychopathic grudges (because not everyone follows my theories) and the cherry on top - I don't waste my energy on something that is not going to matter to me ten years down the line.

"Letting go of toxic people in your life is a big step in loving yourself" - Hussein Nishah

I don't like to call them "toxic", because, as I mentioned earlier, just because I want to let go of them, doesn't mean they are of no use in someone else's life. But, yeah. I've started believing in this new theory. Does it keep me at peace? Yes! I didn't let go of all the unwanted people in my life yet, but I am getting there. One step at a time. Apparently, when you reach that stage, you grow to your fullest potential. Well, that's the plan.

Go ahead, train yourself to outgrow people who aren't meant to stay. It saves a lot of time, effort, energy, and sometimes, money.